You may experience unwelcome and hurtful comments from those around you. It can be difficult to make sense of such remarks, which are usually well intended. Here are some specific examples to be aware of:
Be prepared for the “at least” comments which, by nature, tend to minimize the experience of loss.
-At least you were only __ weeks along.
-At lease you know you can get pregnant.
-At least you didn’t have to give birth.
-At lease the pregnancy wasn’t planned.
You will most likely hear comments such as:
You can always try again.
This is just “nature’s way.” Something must have been wrong with the baby.
It was probably for the better.
Decide in advance to forgive those who make insensitive remarks.
Strive to look beyond the words that are spoken and examine the intent of the person making the comment. Consider your relationship to the individual and what you believe their true motives are behind their words. Doing so will help you respond with grace. Be prepared for these comments and stand firm in the knowledge that your child’s life – no matter how brief, whether planned or unplanned – matters.
Our Advocates know what you are going through. You are not alone. Give us a call today at 719.544.9312.